Thursday, August 7, 2014

Off My Game

The hubbs left yesterday for a month give or take, training. Army Calls and he Goes. At least when we were On The Trail and he was a Drill SGT he would go away for a few days every so often but he was always on post just a few miles away. Most of those nights I'd take him dinner or a drink so I still got to see him. Not this time around, he's thousands of miles away and has crappy cell service at that. Blah. When he moved out to TN and I was still in the South we were apart for just over a month but that was by choice. By no means was it any easier, it still sucked but at least we had a say in that part. I took a long lunch yesterday from work to go take the hubbs to work and say our see you soon's. :( It was no bueno, I had a huge lump in my throat when I had to tell him bye yesterday. Its been over three years since we've had to be apart from each other for longer than a couple weeks at a time. Life On The Trail, Tradoc. Welcome back to the real army were duty calls and they go. Blah!! I headed back to work shortly after I dropped him off and it hadn't really set in yet. It wasn't until I was walking out of work that I "remembered" he was gone and I'd be going home to a empty house. Well plus the pups. There goes that lump in my throat again, I held back the tears as I made the drive home. The one good thing about working 15 minutes from home is the fact that it gives me time to think, clear my head, gather my thoughts.
I'm still getting used to staying in our new house by myself. During the day its no big deal but at night its another story. We live out near the country, so there's a million different noises being made all through the night. Creepy!!!! I know a couple people in our neighborhood but no one I'm close to. It is a safe nice area, so that makes me feel comfortable being here alone. This morning was normal, he's always gone when I get up for work so nothing different there. But still the though knowing he's not going to be here when I get home from work just gets me down. Today at work was just a off day for me. I'm sure it didn't help that I was up late last night. My class was in a funk, I kept having to get on to them for stupid little stuff and then my co-worker (one of my only friends at wrk) was leaving early and I'd be there pretty much by myself. Who was I going to talk to?!?! Then there was my run, I go on my lunch every day. I headed out, had a plan in my head just as I always do and it started off just fine. That was short lived and failed right after the first mile. I pushed through and kept going, around mile 1.50 I was hurting my leg was feeling tight and I wasn't myself. I tried telling myself it was all in my head and pushed on through another 1.50 miles and that was all I could manage. I hated more than anything not finishing what I set out to do but that happens. Its only been the 2nd bad run I've had in two months but still I let it get to me more than I probably should. It happens, it will only make me stronger in the long run. I am always reminding myself that life's not perfect and so not all of my runs are going to be. I think since I'm not training for a big race right now I forget about the bad days. I know tomorrow's a new day and I'm calling it a early night tonight. I did take the pups on a walk this evening just as I had planned, didn't spend any money today and even cooked dinner. Night two done and over, sure there's many more to come but two less to go through. Not that I'm counting or anything. 
Well enough of my rambling nonsense. I'll leave you with a picture of us from yesterday. 
I'm hoping to get back into the whole blogging thing more, now that I have don't have a lot going on in the evenings. I've been slacking something crazy. :-/


Stephanie said...

It always stinks when they leave. I always hate the night time. I swear I double/triple check all the doors several times because I get freaked out by the noise. Thank goodness the dogs are around to keep me company and distracted!

Jamie said...

It sucks when they're gone. Thinking about you.

Janna Renee said...

Aww! Sorry he had to leave you. It's definitely the nights that are the worst.