Work has totally been a drag since I have been back. It's not not even the fact that Gabe has left from R&R. Day one when I went back I broke down but I've done pretty good since then. The staff in my class has changed on some levels and its just a hard adjustment. I mean they are the same people just personality wise they are different. I almost feel like the "new person" in the class & that the two of them are BFF's. It's just something that has been hard for me to adjust to. Not that I care what kind of friendship they have, but it's hard when I feel left out. Or When X isn't there then Z is her self & everything is ok. But when X & Z are both there is like pulling teeth to get though the day. Well to 2pm at least because that's when X leaves. I have been in the classroom the longest, I turned it around and brought it to what it is now. To see them act and speak the way they do really gets to me. Maybe its just me taking things to personal but I have a soft heart & can't seem to help it. I can pretty much stand up to any one and say what I feel and speak my mind, however in this situation its different. I have to work with these two people every day and if I say something that brings tension to the room it may make for a awkward work day.
I'm hoping that it is just a phase & that it passes soon. For the first time today, I though I can't wait to move so I can get out of this situation that I am in. Not very often do I "want" to move already so this is a big deal to me. Just about every day this week something or someone has almost brought me to tears and I just bite my tongue and go about whatever it was that I was doing. I look forward to my lunch every day because I know I can come home work out some of my frustration on the Air Rower & then go back to work & X will be gone.
I'm missing Gabe more than ever so sure maybe that has a tiny bit to do with it but it's no were near all the problem at all. This afternoon my old co-worker, aka Spouse / Best Friend Sarah stopped by the center around 4pm when it was just me & a couple kiddos. She came with yummy sweet comfort food from Starbucks to cheer me up. She knows what has been going on & though a visit to see me would help cheer me up. I absolutely love her to death and she always know the way to my heart lol.
After work when I got home the pups and I went for a walk around the track as we have been doing every evening. I walked the first lap around with them so they can get some of their energy out. I jogged the second lap around, they did so good & stayed right with me the whole time. It definitely has been a great stress reliever getting out with them & getting some fresh air. Work aside, I'm so in love with this new life style of exercising / working out & eating better. I am turning my life around & couldn't be more happier.